A Girl Named Leney

THE JOURNAL

This Is The Time

this is the time in which you'll be split down the middle on things. in a sentence: it’s a transition from i-believe-this-because-you-do to i-believe-this-because-i-do.

this is the time in which your opinions and beliefs are traveling from the side of blind following to hard earned opened eyed searching and seeing for yourself. which will sometimes entail a fight-for-it-even-when-it’s-hard believing. this is the in-between moment of those two times. 
be okay with that. 
you'll end up on the other side eventually. 

this is the time in which you'll curl up under your covers late at night in the dark and have a three hour transatlantic phone conversation with your best friend. a conversation about what love is. 
something will shift in your understanding during that conversation. 
don't let go of it. 

this is the time when you'll realize it's far more important to look people in the eye and offer them your hand, than it is to be comfortable. 

this is the time in which you'll understand, finally, why it is you do the things you do and how you are the way you are. but what's more than just understanding it, you'll love it. you'll love yourself. fully. 

this is the time in which you'll finally realize that, really, no one else gives a damn and so you shouldn't either. 

this is the time in which you'll realize there's a secret club. that you're the head of it. that everyone, in fact, has their own secret club. and what's terribly important and sacred is the people you choose to let into it. 
but in the same vein: don't be close minded and overly selective about who you let in. 

this is the time in which you will be told it will be okay. 
this is also the time in which you will actually believe it.